Shadow Tolhurst

HEARTBREAKING NEWS (24.5.2019)

A devastated Wendy shared the passing of her beloved Shadow on Face Book by telling everyone “Tonight we said goodbye to our “best girl” Shadow. Having had problems with her back a few years ago, she had been doing really well – in fact, when she had a visit to the vet recently, he commented on how great she looked for 11 years.

Unfortunately, in the past 10 days, her back legs went but, as she was still so happy, the vet recommended we try her on some medication to see if it would help.

Sadly, in the past 48 hours, she deteriorated very quickly and we had to make the decision to prevent her from suffering more pain – a decision which our vet fully supported.

We feel blessed that we were able to rescue her at 8 weeks. Shadow has been the most loyal, loving family member and we will all miss her terribly We will never forget her and our memories of her will live on in our hearts forever.

A WHITE FEATHER

You’ve gone from me, I miss you so
Your shining coat as soft as snow
Your big brown eyes with gentle gaze
Your loss has left me in a daze.
Alone I amble down the road
No-one to share my heavy load
Just one more day with you I crave
One special hug you always gave
Our days were always full of fun
You loved to walk and jump and run
Always faithful by my side
Matching me on every stride
One more look I yearn to see
One moment shared with you and me
One gentle kiss upon my face
Remembering, I slow my pace
My eyes well up, here come the tears
Where are you now to quash my fears?
I’d swap a fortune, that’s so true
For just a little sign from you
I pause and close my reddened eyes
I feel you near, I tell no lies
On my face I feel your kiss
Am I dreaming? What is this?
My eyes wide open now, I see
A pure white feather sent to me
I knew that you would send a sign
Of love forever yours and mine

Jeff Shepherd

HOW WENDY BROKE HER SAD NEWS TO PAULINE

Having been a part of Shadow’s life, Wendy wanted to tell Pauline and Steve personally. Wendy said “We had to say goodbye to Shadow this evening.  We all know it is never an easy decision but, as I said to the vet tonight, we do have a choice … we can either love a dog and suffer heartache when we lose him or her or we can just not have a dog at all and that would be a far greater shame”.

Wendy went on to say “Shadow had been doing really well. About a month or so ago, we took her to our vet with a haematoma in her ear and he commented on how well she was looking and that her previous back problem hadn’t held her back.

Unfortunately, this good health was to be short-lived.  Last week, we noticed that she had lost co-ordination in her hind legs so we took her to the vet fearing the worst. We were relieved to hear, he felt that, although there was a definite issue, she was so happy in herself that we needed to give her a chance, just in case it was a fragment of disc causing her temporary problems. He prescribed Gabapentin, to be taken along with the pain relief she was already on and he told us “only time will tell”.  

Phil and I were due to go away for a couple of days from the Sunday evening until the Wednesday.  We monitored her carefully beforehand then decided on the Saturday that, whilst we weren’t convinced she was improving, she didn’t seem to be any worse. So, we were happy to leave her at home with my brother and our children (who are now adults except for Lauren) and with Bono, our black Labrador, and her best friend. 

On Wednesday evening, when we returned, Shadow was delighted to see us.  I had come in the front door and she was lying in the conservatory but, when I called her, she came bounding in, excited to see us. She, then, rolling over for tummy rubs etc.  At this point, I felt very relieved that she appeared to have made some progress and it did seem as though the in depth conversations Phil and I had had about her, whilst we were away, were unnecessary, at least in the short term.  

On the Thursday morning, Shadow still seemed very bright, although perhaps a little more wobbly than I had first thought.  My brother commented on how much better she had seemed on the Thursday and told us she had been very flat whilst we were away which he hadn’t found too surprising.

On Thursday, Shadow was even play fighting with Bono. I took my brother home and did a few things and then returned home. It didn’t take long for me to realise that it had been the excitement of seeing us that had helped Shadow mask her problem. Now, she could barely stand on her back legs without wobbling this way and that and she was ending up in a sitting position with her left leg (which was the worst affected) bent back behind her, rather than tucked under her.  Seeing her like that, we had that awful feeling when you know in your heart “it was time”.  

We had an appointment with our lovely vet this evening and so we made the plans for tonight.  My eldest daughter is in London but she had told her sister she was coming home tonight, so when she called me I explained what was happening. As it turned out, plans had changed and she wasn’t able to come home but she had been home the previous weekend and, just in case, she had said her “goodbyes” then. 

My son came in from work and made a big fuss of Shadow.  He then went upstairs but, just before Phil got in, he did come back down to say his “goodbye” to her. It was the first time that I had seen him cry for a very long time. Part of what upset him was to see, although her legs had gone, Shadow still seemed happy and she still wanted fuss. 

Lauren, Phil and I put both dogs in the car, picked up Jess from work and we all headed for the vet’s.  Phil and I stayed with Shadow, whilst Jess and Lauren waited with Bono in the car.  When it was over, they came in to say a final “goodbye” and we let Bono sniff Shadow. He had always been very reliant on her for confidence and we knew he would find the coming weeks unsettling so we wanted to try and help him understand. 

Although Bono seemed ok when he was at the vets, he has been extremely subdued this evening. As you can imagine, the whole household has been in tears, with all our hearts aching for our beloved Shadow.  However, we all knew it was the right and kindest thing to do for her and we owed her that for all the love and loyalty she had given us throughout the 11 wonderful years we shared with her. 

This is a photo of Shadow and I last night. You can see she was loving until the very end. The other one is with her beloved Dad”.

WE ALL MISS SHADOW

Wendy also told Pauline “I have always said, because our dogs give us so much love and loyalty, we owe it to them to do what is best for them when the time comes even though it is very hard for us.

It is awful here without Shadow but, I suppose, I must be grateful that her deterioration was so quick and she didn’t have to endure months of vet visits, not to mention us constantly worrying about whether or not she was in pain.

Jess (my middle daughter, who is now nearly 20yrs) works in the pet department of a local garden centre and, the week after we lost Shadow, Lauren (the youngest) and I were in the pet department just picking up some things for the cats. We came across a man holding a beautiful German Shepherd pup who was 11 weeks old. Although he was very cute, I just burst into tears because he just reminded me too much of Shadow”. 

BONO MISSES HER TOO

Wendy continued “I think it will be quite some time before we get over our loss but poor Bono is finding it really hard without Shadow too.  Since he was first rescued, he has never been alone. 

When we first fostered him for Black Retriever Cross, we also fostered a Black Lab / Collie Cross, called Allie, who had been wandering the streets with Bono. They had been fostered together by somebody in Ireland from the September before coming to us together in the November.  We had both dogs with us until around March, when Allie went to her forever home. 

Whilst assessing them, we recognised that Allie was not at all reliant on any of the other dogs, whereas Bono was far more insecure and much preferred having other dogs around him.  Initially, when Allie was adopted, Bono had both Shadow and Daisy for company but, following the loss on Daisy, Bono came to totally rely on Shadow. She was almost like a security blanket for him. 

Fortunately, I am around a great deal of the time and, since losing Shadow, whenever I go somewhere where Bono is welcome eg taking one of the children to work or school, I have taken to allowing him to come with us so that he isn’t on his own. 

SHADOW’S EARLY YEARS

In 1994, shortly after purchasing our first house, we adopted Barney, a Golden Retriever of about a year old, from a local rescue.  Barney was part of our family until January 2008, when he crossed to Rainbow Bridge. 

For a couple of months, we were dogless.  We had 4 children by then and we were all grieving.  We were also missing the family time spent walking the dog together at weekends.  Of course, we could still go for walks but, then, we were constantly reminded of how much a dog would enjoy the walks. 

By the time April came, we decided we would like to add another dog to our family. We didn’t have any particular breed / type in mind, although in our minds, Phil and I were slightly reluctant to have another Goldie as we didn’t feel any other Golden could live up to Barney and we didn’t want to feel we were constantly comparing another dog to him.

Just on the off-chance, we returned to the same rescue that Barney had come from.  In the first pen was a GSD with a week old puppy.  The puppy was up for adoption and, coincidentally, she had been born on the day we had lost Barney (29.01.2008).  We all fell in love and we were able to take her with us the same day.

We named her Shadow and bought her a crate so that she could be crate trained. As our youngest child was only 18 months old, we wanted to make sure Shadow had somewhere she could go and not be disturbed. 

Although we had asked what food she was being fed and purchased the same food, she had a very upset stomach.  We had taken her home on the Monday and, by the Wednesday, we were at the vet with her.  The vet was quite concerned as he treated Shadow and advised us that, if there was no improvement within the next 48 hours, she needed to be seen again. This was the case and, on the Friday, when we took her back, the vet was so concerned that he admitted her and she was kept in until the following Tuesday. 

To nearly lose her so quickly was very worrying and we had many conversations with the rescue to try to find out what was the cause.  They were very sketchy about things and, because we had had snow on the Tuesday after we took her home, they told us she must have eaten snow and it had upset her. The vet strongly disagreed with this but the important thing was that she was ok and we could take her home. 

Shadow always had a sensitive stomach, something not uncommon in GSDs, but, fortunately, she only had to go to the vets a couple of other times during her life with this problem. That was particularly fortunate because, having been ill as soon as we had her, the pet insurance we had for her never covered stomach issues.

Shadow developed from a gorgeous pup into a beautiful, intelligent dog. She was a large, powerful girl but, due to her nature and her speed and eagerness to learn, she was very receptive to Phil training her. 

She loved being with the family, learned daily routines and loved being walked in the woods opposite our house every day as well as going further afield during weekends and holidays.

She enjoyed travelling in the car and would happily settle in the boot, aware that a car journey usually led to a good walk somewhere different. 

We had numerous cats and Shadow was great with them, letting them rub themselves against her for fuss, and sharing her bed in the colder weather but, when Shadow was about a year old, we decided that we would like to have another dog in the family – both for us to love and as a companion for Shadow. So, in February 2009, we made contact with Pauline from IRR and we adopted George which was where our story with IRR began.

A WONDERFUL IRR FOSTER DOG

For those who don’t know us, Phil and I have been supporters of the IRR for a number of years and spent quite a while transporting and fostering for them.

Each time the foster dogs came into our home, Shadow, would welcome them and help them to settle and feel less scared. She was great with every, single, foster dog. Interestingly, whilst we were fostering, Shadow growled at someone for the first ever time in her life. You can imagine my relief when this person did not go on to adopt the dog we were fostering as there was, clearly, something about them that Shadow didn’t trust”.

THE IRR ADOPTEES

During the years of fostering for IRR, Wendy and family also adopted three IRR rescues their “bad boy” George , dear old Bertie, now gone to Rainbow Bridge, and beautiful Daisy, also, sadly, passed away.

With all three dogs Shadow welcomed her new “sibling” into the family home and did her best to show them the ropes. Unfortunately, this turned out to be a bit of an uphill battle with George!

Through no fault of his, after a very abusive start to his life, he remained very distrustful of strangers even though he totally adored his large family. Because of that, it was an extremely upset Wendy who rang Pauline with the news that George had bitten a neighbour that had entered their garden despite having been told not to do so!!! With teenagers coming and going, the risk would have been too great to keep George so there was really only one decision that could be made.

It was a very tearful Wendy and Phil who took George all the way to Pauline and Steve’s home in Somerset but they loved him so much they knew they had to be brave and let him go to a more suitable quiet environment which would better suit a reactive boy like him.

As it happened, George and Shadow had spent several weeks with Pauline and Steve the previous year, when the family went to Canada and kennels were out of the question for George. This turned out to be much longer than the expected time because the family returned to find their bathroom in their lounge because of a burst water tank!

Of course, both Pauline and Steve were secretly really pleased to have Shadow for a bit longer than expected as, being huge GSD lovers, they absolutely adored her.

On the night when George had to be rehomed, the family must have felt very relieved when George greeted Pauline and Steve like old friends, as did Shadow, and, to their delight, he fitted straight back into the family with all his doggy friends as if he had never been away.

George is approaching 12yrs now and, to this day, he is still living a very happy life in Somerset. Having regular updates on him, definitely helped Wendy and Phil feel better about having to make the horrible decision which was the only one they could, realistically, have made for him.

Pauline freely admitted she wished it had been Shadow who had had the problem and had needed rehoming (nothing against George) but, of course, there was no way Wendy’s perfect girl would have ever blotted her copybook!

The news of Shadow’s passing has left both Pauline and Steve totally heartbroken too.

AFTER GEORGE

After the trauma of naughty George, Pauline wanted Wendy and Phil to wait for an easy, unassuming, gentle dog who would be easy to care for and that came in the shape of Albert, an unclaimed stray who was supposed to be 7 or 8yrs old but was, more likely, 9 to 10 years.

He was about the size of a Springer Spaniel like a Golden Retriever in minature. They called him Bertie and he was so content and laid-back, it made them realise that, much as they loved George and still missed him, he just wasn’t the right dog for them. Bertie, on the other hand, was perfect for the family and they were grateful they had been made to wait for just the right dog.

Shadow, of course, took to Bertie straight away and they got on very well together. His temperament was so relaxed and laid back he actually seemed to be a calming influence on her. They loved going on walks, pottering quite happily together, and he was an absolute sweetie both on and off lead. He was so laid back even 4 year old Lauren could walk him on a lead without any problems.

Shadow absolutely loved the snow and enjoyed catching snowballs and rolling in the snow and generally playing with the children. Bertie was not so keen as, although he was happy enough to go out for a short walk, he found the snow a little too cold on the paws for his liking!! Shadow really missed her dear old friend Bertie when he, sadly, passed away in February 2013 although, by then, she did have the companionship of Daisy, who Bertie and Shadow had both welcomed into their home in July 2011, as a foster girl.

Wendy and Phil soon failed as fosterers, to nobody’s surprise, when they fell in love with gentle, 6 yrs old, ex-breeder Daisy who had arrived from Wales with her two sisters, Mai and Ellie May. Before they met her, she had a couple of days in Somerset with Belinda and Terry to settle but she seemed quite happy to move on and leave them. Daisy took no notice of the various cats and she was really good with young Lauren but she never really learnt to play like a “normal” dog would.

Shadow and Daisy, of course, soon became firm friends and remained so even after the arrival of young Bono. It was after Daisy’s passing that Bono became totally reliant on Shadow.

Sadly, all three girls that came from the horrible Welsh puppy farm have now crossed over Rainbow Bridge and would have been waiting to greet Shadow along with Bertie.